Weight Loss Story

I always feel strange telling my "weight loss story" because my weight has always been up and down... and I didn't keep very good track of it.

In middle school, I was overweight. I was the chubby girl that hated running. I felt very awkward about myself and I found attention by being the funny, crazy girl. 

These are really embarrassing. 

Then, I went to high school. I really wanted to play sports but I never tried out. I felt too fat and too slow. I have no idea if I was classified as "overweight" in high school but I felt overweight. Looking back at pictures, I wasn't that big of a girl:

I've always hated my legs. I think they are fat and chunky. 

I found ways to avoid showing off my legs in the summer - wear hospital pants or a skirt. 

Then.... I went to college. And I gained a lot of weight - I think my highest weight was in the Spring of 2008 (2 years of being college). I ate crappy - really crappy. Then I went to Yellowstone National Park to work for a summer and that kick started my weight loss. 

Now, the last three years have been up and down. I was never as big as I was in 2008 but I did gain weight and started to feel like the chubby girl again. 

Then... I went to Yellowstone National Park again! And it (once again), kick started more weight loss. Once I got back, I continued to loose weight and we get to today. . . 

Here is the grand "before and after" picture:

The picture the left is the biggest picture of me I could find. The picture on the right is the most recent picture of me. It was snapped on my boyfriends phone while I tried on clothes (for fun) at Banana Republic. 

I have lost 70 pounds and went down 6 dress sizes. 

It's strange because I have never been this size. I am not use to it. 

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Since I'm going along the theme of being honest - I'll be honest. . . 

Currently (as in right now as I'm typing in my bed), I hate being skinny. Well, that's kind of lie - I love it and hate it. I love it because I feel awesome. I can walk into a store and try on almost anything and it probably will look good. I don't need to worry about love handles, tires, or muffin tops.

I hate it because nothing in my closet fits. And if you've been following my blog then you know that I am on a strict "no spending" budget. 

On Christmas Eve, I am suppose to go out to dinner with my boyfriend's family. I am very stressed out about this. I was told to wear something nice but not formal. This is the worse situation for me. Even before (when all my clothes fit), I would stress out about this. But now, I literally don't have anything to wear. I thought maybe, I had some black pants I could wear so I tried them on. This is what it looks like:

This is how most my clothes look. All my tops can be pinch in the back about 3 - 4 inches.

I feel like such a brat right now. I'm complaining because I'm "too skinny" and that I "don't have enough clothes." I'm ashamed to admit that because I should be thankful that I'm in a healthy BMI range (finally) and that I have any clothes (even if they are too big). 

But regardless of my efforts to be thankful, I'm still stressed about what to wear on Saturday. . . 

Sorry for getting so off track and dampening the mood of my weight loss story. This is just how I'm feeling currently (on a grey rainy day). Taking a step back, I feel happy and proud of myself - it's taken a lot of work to loose weight. I shouldn't worry about buying clothes that fit because I can do that in the future. Now is the time that I should focus on maintaining my weight and making sure I don't gain it back.

And if you are curious how I lost it - eating less, drinking lots of water, and exercising.